What to do when you consistently hear, “your idea will never work.”
Frank Sinatra is usually not the first person people think of when they are looking for commentators who have a firm handle on the entrepreneurial process, but maybe they should.
The title track of his 1966 album was called That’s Life and in that song about resilience (written by Dean Kay and Kelly Gordon) Sinatra sings “and funny as it may seem, some people get their kicks stompin’ on a dream.”
And that’s what happens a lot, when you have a new idea. A lot of people will try to knock it down and yes, indeed, stomp on it once they do. It’s just what occurs when you try to create something.
Why?
Well, some of those people saying negative things legitimately are trying to be helpful. They want to make sure that you have considered everything possible thing that could go wrong.
As for the rest, you probably need a room full of psychologists and psychiatrists to figure out their motivations: envy, the desire to make themselves look better by making you look worse, sexism, bigotry, a consistently pessimistic outlook on life, or simply schadenfreude, getting pleasure from the misery of others. The list goes on and on and I am sure you could add to it without trying very hard.
What do you do in face of negative comments? How should you respond?
Well, if the criticism is truly constructive, take it seriously and make sure you have an answer that proves it wrong. It is possible that people have discovered flaws or have constructed market scenarios that you never imagined. These are the negative comments worth considering.
But as for the comments that seem to be negative just for the sake of being negative, or are mean-spirited, let me offer four bits of advice:
- When people tell you it can’t be done, all it means for certain is that they can’t do it. It does not mean that you can’t. And it certainly doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t try.
- Never take any negative comment personally. Constructive criticism, as we have said, can be helpful. Pure negativity is something else. Always consider the source.
- Stay focused. Ignore what people say, concentrate on the obstacle in front of you and figure out how you can overcome it. Sweeping generalizations by people who are not in the trenches with you, and who don’t truly understand what you are trying to accomplish aren’t worth very much. If people are not offering positive, helpful alternatives, move on.
- Keep proving yourself right. The easiest way to build confidence? Take one small successful step. And then another. And another.
My ultimate bit of advice about how to respond in the face of negativity: Let others underestimate you. It can only work to your benefit.
The road to starting anything new is difficult. You will encounter not only potholes, but full blown obstacles and roadblocks.
When they happens, Mr. Sinatra (from the same song that opened the blog) has good advice: “Each time I find myself flat on my face I pick myself up and get back in the race.”
That is not a course of action you are going to hear from the sayers.
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